


Waiting.

by QueenofDreams



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Gen, Major Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-21
Updated: 2017-05-21
Packaged: 2018-11-03 05:37:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10960806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenofDreams/pseuds/QueenofDreams
Summary: Estevez and Zimmerfield find themselves working on a new case, every bit as baffling as the last. Written as part of the 2017 Beginner Bang in collaberation with fayzart136 https://fayzart136.tumblr.com/post/160886851826/done-as-part-of-the-beginner-dghda-big-bang-in here's a link to their lovely work.





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Estevez blinked. He took one quick glance around, then blinked again. Nothing changed. He tried a third blink, just to be sure. The scene remained the same.  
A strange opaque haze clouded his vision, limiting his field of view to a one foot radius. Vague silhouettes moved within that fog, just out of sight. Within his shortened field of view stood a familiar figure, face slightly blurred by the pervasive haze.

Zimmerfield. 

It took a few moments of concentration to bring the name to memory. The dim light and otherworldly silence seemed to have dimmed his mind as well. Once the name surfaced in his wandering mind, he felt a surge of joy so intense it caught him quite off-guard. Why was he so happy at the sight of his old friend? There must be a reason. He tried to recall his recent history, but came up blank.

He looked over at his friend. Zim looked back, his placid, stoic expression achingly familiar. A bittersweet well of emotion sprang up in his chest at the sight, making his eyes water treacherously.  
'Hey, man' was all he could muster by way of greeting  
'Hey back. It's good to see you,' came the reply after a moment's silence.  
'So, what you doing, Zim?' Estevez asked.  
'Doing? I'm waiting' Zimmerfield said, as though this should have been obvious.  
'What you waiting for?' Estevez asked, when it was clear that no more information was coming his way.  
'I dunno,' Zim said, 'for someone. I think. Someone will come.'  
'So, what do I do? Wait with you?'  
'Wait with me' Zimmerfield echoed 'seems like it.'

They stood in silence, and the shadowy figures ahead receded further into the shrouding mist. The detectives shuffled forwards a few steps until they brought their vague companions back into view.  
Estevez let his mind wander. It seemed to want to do that in this strange place. He had no idea why he was here, or what had come before. All attempts to remember were fruitless, vague snatches of memory emerging briefly from the depths of his mind, just to sink beneath the surface again, too quickly to grasp at any meaning to them. 

His mind's eye pictured a man in a bright jacket, his face wearing an even brighter smile, slightly inane looking. A girl with a vacant expression, a woman with the most incredible hair and a beautiful smile. A dog. Was that significant? Why would he think of a dog?

Estevez cleared his throat.  
'Zim?'   
'Yep?'  
'How did we get here?' he asked. He couldn't remember, but maybe his old friend had figured it out.  
'Get here?' Zimmerfield replied, 'I dunno, man. I think I've always been here. Haven't we always been here?'  
'I...' Estevez stopped, confused, and tried to concentrate, to think of … what was he trying to think of?   
'Yeah,' he continued, 'yeah, that's right. We're here, we always have been. Where else would we be, right? Nowhere else TO be. That's right. Right here. As always.' He felt as though he was trying to convince himself of this self-evident fact. He briefly recalled the dog. He couldn't see a dog anywhere. Couldn't see anything except Zimmerfield, the ever present white mist and a few dark silhouettes ahead.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

 

The fog shifted, as it always had done. The dark figures ahead receded, fading into the mist as they always did. Muffled sounds drifted through the heavy silence as usual. This place felt like eternity, and he had been here for an eternity, drifting through the cloudy silence with a head full of fog to match his surroundings. He didn't know how long it had been since he had spoken with his friend. There didn't seem to be much to say. It didn't matter anyway, nothing mattered now. He had this strange feeling that this hadn't always been the case, that something HAD mattered very much. He vaguely recalled a sense of urgency that he could no longer muster. Everything was peaceful now, except that little tickling sensation at the back of his mind. Something was trying to be remembered, maybe even something important. But now, maybe the only important thing was to wait. For whatever, or whoever, was coming. Or was he going towards it? There was no way to know. He felt that, at some point in the past, he would have been far more concerned by his current situation. In this place, however, it seemed to make sense. The only thing to do was wait, and there was no point in worrying about anything else.  
Zimmerfield drifted beside him, his habitual calm reassuring in its familiarity. Zim always was the calm one, unflappable. Nothing had ever disturbed him. But there, yet again was that sensation, uneasy in the back of his mind. A vague sense that this wasn't true. Zimmerfield hadn't been calm, in one moment. Something had managed to break down his stoic facade. What was it? Estevez persued the thought and a fragment of memory briefly surfaced. Blood on his hands, panic. The memory slipped away again, leaving him none the wiser.

'So, what comes next, man?' Estevez asked  
'Next?' Zimmerfield paused, then simply shrugged.  
'Well, there must be something, right?' Estevez continued, 'I mean, if we're waiting, there must be something we're waiting for. So when do we find out?'  
Zimmerfield looked bewildered, but answered 'I already told you. We're waiting because someone's going to come. It must be soon. They said they'd come, so they will. All we have to do is wait. Be patient'  
'Yeah, but then what?' Estevez didn't want to let this question go. He needed an answer to this, even if everything else remained confused.  
'Then what, what?'  
'I mean, what comes next? After whoever comes, comes. What then? Where are we going, what are we doing, and why are doing whatever it is that we're doing? We need to figure this shit out!' Estevez realised that he'd raised his voice, but Zimmerfield simply stared back placidly.  
'Why?' he replied.  
'Why what?' Estevez shot back, rather exasperated.  
'Why do we need to figure shit out?' Zimmerfield asked.  
'Well, because we just do ok? We can't just carry on mindlessly wandering off into the distance without even knowing what we're doing or where we're going'  
'Why not?' Zim asked, still as calm as ever.  
'Because I don't like not knowing what's going on, man. Doesn't it bother you?' Estevez answered.  
'Not really,' was Zimmerfield's simple reply and they both drifted back into silence.  
The figures ahead had receded into the mist yet again, and the two detectives continued their slow trudge forward into the unknown. Estevez found himself slipping back into that strange, uncharacteristic apathy yet again. He couldn't recall what had stirred him out of it in the first place. Even the details of his conversation with Zimmerfield were fading in his mind, becoming as hazy as his surroundings. He let himself drift, embracing the unusual sensation of simply not caring. It was rather relaxing. He decided he must usually be a tightly-wound kind of guy, focused, driven, not given to letting himself simply be present in each moment. His state of calm was disrupted, however by an image bobbing up from the depths of his subconscious. That damned dog again! Why was the blasted dog so significant? And where had he seen it, if this place was all he had ever known? The blissful peace of mind vanished as he latched on to the question. WHY did he keep seeing a dog? And why was it sitting in a box?

'Zim?'  
'Yeah'  
'Have I ever owned a dog?' He asked  
'A dog? I...no, no I don't think you have. Why do you ask?' Zimmerfield answered.  
'I just... I keep remembering a dog. A cute one. Do you remember a dog?  
Zimmerfield was silent for a long moment, bushy eyebrows drawn low in thought.  
'I... I don't...maybe?'   
His friend stared at him, bewildered, for a while, then said 'why are we talking about dogs anyway? Dogs don't matter here. All that matters is to make sure we wait. Don't need to think about dogs to wait, do we?' but he still seemed unsettled, as though he, too, was trying to convince himself of something.

Estevez backed off, for the moment. His friend seemed too uncomfortable with their conversation to continue. He expected to return to his blissful daze, but his mind remained preoccupied with the many questions plaguing him. He desperately racked his brain, trying to remember, to come up with any answers, but they eluded him as they so often did now. Deep in thought, he continued his slow shuffle forwards into the fog, his best friend by his side.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The dog, the strangely vacant-looking girl, the woman with the beautiful smile, the inane smiling man in his colourful jacket, the dog, the girl, the woman, the man, the dog. Estevez stopped his circular train of thought. He'd been silent a long while, shuffling onwards from time to time, brooding all the while. He'd completely failed to unpick the mysteries of his past, present and future. Everything was blank except the now familiar images of the dog, the girl, the woman and the man. The dog, the girl...Lydia. The name came to mind unbidden, and he was certain it belonged to the girl he kept picturing.

'Lydia,' he blurted out, breaking the silence  
'Lydia? Who's Lydia? Where?' Zimmerfield began looking around, trying to see what had prompted the outburst.  
'No! Not here! I remembered! Lydia!'   
Zimmerfield just looked confused. 'Sorry buddy, you lost me. First dogs now this? What's got into you?'  
'I kept remembering something,' Estevez explained, 'a girl. And now I remembered her name. Lydia.  
I wish I knew why she was important. The dog too'  
'Do you remember the dog's name?' Zimmerfield asked.  
'What? No, I don't know the dog's name, but I know it was important. The girl and the dog, both important but I don't know why. Do you recognise the name? At all? C'mon, it must be ringing some kind of bell in there, man. Just try, think a little harder. Close your eyes and try'  
Zimmerfield looked as though he'd rather not bother, but he dutifully closed his eyes.  
'I dunno, is this going to work? Are you sure this is something real, and not your imagination? The only thing I know is where we are, is you.'  
'Just try for me, Zim,' Estevex coaxed 'Think of Lydia, but keep it chilled, ok. Let your mind sort of wander a bit, let it come to you.'  
He watched his friend's eyebrows begin to draw together in thought, then reminded him to relax into it.

'Lydia...Spring' Zimmerfield finally announced. 'Lydia Spring'  
'Lydia Spring,' Estevez echoed

This, at least, was progress. He had a name now. Something more concrete than vague flashes of barely remembered images. Now he just had to figure out what was so important about Lydia Spring.

The partners lapsed into silence once more, continuing their slow, sporadic trudge forward into the murk. Estevez let himself drift in thought once more as he waited for... well, whatever it was that his future held. He tried a few times to force some clarity into his muddled thoughts, but it was as futile now as it had been on his earlier attempts. The only way to bring his memories to mind was to be patient and let them come when they chose to surface.

Zimmerfield turned and raised his eyebrows quizzically at him. The gesture brought a warmth to the depths of Estevez's chest for some reason he could not fathom.   
'What is it, bud?' he asked.  
'Why is this so important to you?' Zim shot back. 'I don't understand. Why can't you just let this go? It'd be easier.'  
'Maybe,' Estevez agreed, 'but I need to know what's going on, Zim. I need to know what's going to happen, where we are, WHY we're here, and what comes next. I can't help thinking that to figure that out, we have to figure out what came before. There was something before. We were somewhere else, we had something we had to do. I'm sure of it. And I need to figure out what it all means'


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

 

Estevez felt a strange sense of urgency bubbling beneath the lassitude and mental fog that this bizarre place induced. He found it easier to hold on to now that he had managed to piece together a small part of the puzzle. He needed to know more. He was starting to think that piecing together his past would help him figure out the mystery of his current situation. Maybe it could even help him figure out what awaited him the future. His partner's assertion that they were waiting for someone didn't give him any comfort. He'd seemed far too vague and uncertain about what, precisely, he was expecting to happen. Zimmerfield seemed far less interested in solving this puzzle, a fact that was immensely confusing for his former partner. Zim had always been dogged and determined, never one to give up on anything, or shirk his duties.  
Estevez didn't know how he knew this. He just did. The same way he knew the look of his own face. He was certain that his friend's lack of interest in finding the truth was out of character, and it was starting to worry him. He had a sinking feeling that the change in Zim's behaviour was down to their current surroundings. All the more reason to find out where the were and how to get out of here. Well, in order to help the both of them out of this fix, he needed to stop being preoccupied with Zim's behaviour and turn his attention to the real cause of the problem.

The only point of reference he had right now was the girl, Lydia. He sank further into thought as he walked aimlessly along, her name becoming a chant in his head, repeating over and over. As he thought of her, images began to come to mind once again. Lydia's face. The small, curious looking dog. A startled looking man with large eyes wearing a ridiculous uniform. A standoff full of shouting, waving guns and general confusion. 'Are you aware you just gave every possible response to that question?'

'What?' Zim asked.  
'Hmm?'  
'What was that?' Zim looked confused  
Estevez hadn't realised that he'd spoken that sentence out loud.  
'Nothing man, I was just thinking.'  
'About what?' This seemed slightly more positive that their previous interactions at least. Zim was actually taking an interest.  
'About Lydia' Estevez answered. His friend looked blank for a few moments before a look of recogntion washed across his face.  
'Lydia of course, I'd forgotten.' He looked troubled for a moment. 'Why does that bother me?'  
'It bothers me too, man' Estevez replied. He wanted to comfort his friend, but he didn't know how. He didn't have enough information to offer any genuine reassurance. Zimmerfield seemed to start sinking back into apathy again, then shook himself back to alertness, 'Ok then, let's backtrack. What was it you said just then? Every possible response? Who were you thinking of when you said that?'  
Estevez had to think hard for a moment to dredge the memory back up to the surface.   
'Uh, I was talking to a guy, I think. Weird looking, you know? Big eyes. Stupid uniform.'  
'ok, bud, work backwards from there. Why were you talking to him?'

Silence fell again as Estevez worked to remember the details, so distant now it seemed.   
'Um, he saw something. A witness, I think?'  
The two former detectives moved forwards once again in their seemingly endless journey to nowhere, slowly piecing together the details of a murder. Now they worked together again as they had in the past, and the work became easier. Estevez could picture the scene clearly in his head for the first time since he arrived here, the trashed hotel room decorated in swathes of blood. The bizarre chunks bitten out of the furniture, the seemingly random burns and the corpses strewn around the room like toys, carelessly discarded once broken. 'Patrick Spring,' he whispered, 'that was it. Patrick Spring's murder. We thought it could be a lead in his daughter's disappearance'

Both men began to walk faster in their excitement talking as they went, a habit carried over from their days as detectives. Estevez felt truly alive for the first time since he saw his friend's face in the haze, energised by their progress. All the flashes of memory were now almost tangible, the pieces falling into place to create a solid picture of his past. Todd Brotzman, shifty and perpetually confused. Farah Black, intelligent and oh so capable. Dirk Gently, puppy like in his enthusiasm. A The vacant face of Rapunzel-not-Lydia. Blood on his hands, and panic. Grief. A deadly bolt through the chest. Stay with me.

He stopped walking. 

Zimmerfield overshot him by a few steps, surprised by his abrupt halt.

'Buddy, what's wrong?'  
Estevez stood silent, stricken. He remembered it all now. Begging his partner to make it to the hospital. Zimmerfield's last words. He didn't know how to answer, so he just held up his hand to signal that he needed a moment. Zimmerfield was dead. He knew it. So why was he here? Or, more worryingly, why was Estevez here, in the same place? He let his mind work forwards from that moment. Confronting his boss in the office and losing his job. Drinking while talking to a dog, thinking he was crazy. Todd and Dirk caged like animals, Dirk injured, Todd telling his insane story of body swapping cultists and time travel, a firefight with Ms Black at his side, getting Lydia back. 

'Zim, I don't understand.' he said. 'We got her back, we solved the case. So what the hell happened?'  
'I'm not following you' Zim replied, taken aback by the sudden shift in atmosphere.  
'I just need another minute to think this through,' 

'Zim, you were shot. With a crossbow. You died! Why aren't you dead? Am I crazy, seeing a dead guy and talking to him?!'  
'Whoa, buddy, hang on there. I'd know if I were dead, ok? I'm right here, so I'm not dead. I'm as alive as you are'

It came to him then, the man dressed all in black, rambling about files and money. He remembered the searing pain of bullets pushing through his chest and side in quick succession.  
The weird fog surrounding him seemed to grow lighter, more luminous.

'Zim, did we die? 'Cause right now, I'm starting to think we both died. You took a crossbow bolt through the chest and I got shot by a raving lunatic with a gun. And now we're here and we couldn't remember anything and this place is seriously weird, man. Capital 'W' weird. So, do you think we're dead?'

Zim's eyes lost focus as he tried to put his memory back together, then his expression shifted to horror. 

They both began to move forwards once more. There was really nothing else to do. They remained silent now, bereft of words.

The fog continued to lighten as they walked slowly into the gradually building light. Suddenly, a door was there, bright and inviting. 'So, what happens now, Zim?'  
'How about we go find out?' his friend replied. They linked arms, shared one last look, and walked through the door, together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I hope you can forgive me if this seems like it was a little rushed! Life got hectic on me and I found myself with no time to write.

**Author's Note:**

> Based off this prompt: The audience for this is probs one, maybe two, but: gimme post death Estevez & Zimmerfield in a purgatorial, waiting for godot like situation. They don't know what happens next and neither do we.
> 
> This is my first time ever writing fic, I hope I've done this justice.


End file.
